Now, I am being called on walk in spirals and instead of just walking on to Toulouse, I actually have to, and get to - walk in England, and complete the initiation of the first chakra, the root chakra. There is no where else for me to do that but in England, my true home both on a soul level and also on a very third dimensional level too. As I've mentioned, I was born in England. My parents are English. We are the first generation to live in America. We are actually first generation immigrants!!
As I walk the Celtic Camino, it is so easy to imagine just walking from Santiago over into France and over to Toulouse, then Orléans, and so on up to the seventh chakra of Rosslyn. It's such a nice, straight line and so easy to imagine and follow the map. Right? Yet, truthfully, we all know that life rarely unfolds in a straight line. To get from Point A to Point B is usually, if not always, a curvy line with twists and turns, much like a labyrinth and spiral.
Martha Beck says it beautifully:
You’re walking the labyrinth of life. Yes, you’re meant to move forward, but almost never in a straight line. Yes, there’s an element of achievement, of beginning and ending, but those are minor compared to the element of being here now. In the moments you stop trying to conquer the labyrinth of life and simply inhabit it, you’ll realize it was designed to hold you safe as you explore what feels dangerous. You’ll see that you’re exactly where you’re meant to be, meandering along a crooked path that is meant to lead you not onward, but inward.
Right now, I am being deeply called to walk inward, deeply inward to myself, and to connect with, actually reconnect with my taproot. I am going on a spiral walk that will actually move me forward in a way that I cannot even imagine. I have to go home, go back, go within, by myself, so that I can actually move forward. There is no moving forward until I complete this piece. My walking in England is actually the spiral journey that completes the 80 kilometers from Auch to Toulouse. Who would have thought that I would be walking in England rather than simply continuing on in France?
I have done everything in my life to actually avoid this journey, especially doing it alone. It does not feel safe. I do not feel safe. I am scared of exploring what feels dangerous, of the unknown, of what I was told to never want. Yet I have lived without my roots and my connection to the deep core of my being for long enough. I am tired of living outside in, upside down, and backwards. I am so tired of it.
I share all of this with you because I am walking with the intention of deep and complete healing of my first chakra. I want to complete spiral of the journey so that I can continue walking my pilgrimage of initiation, and journey from Toulouse to Orleans, into the second chakra and its initiations. The issues associated with this root chakra are the ones that have challenged me for as long as I can remember - being grounded, connection with my body and the world, feeling secure, having sense of rootedness and connection to place, and belonging, ability and willingness to take effective action, financial generation and support. Andoea Judith speaks to this in her groundbreaking book, Eastern Body, Western Mind:
The characteristics of good grounding, connection with our bodies and the physical world, self-nourishment, and self-preservation contribute to this ability to manifest prosperity....This is about being able to handle the basic demands of earth plane, the requirements of living in a physical body. In order to meet those survivals needs, we must be able to deal with our immediate physical environment - to extract from it what we need for our personal or familial preservation. This is the testing ground for our first chakra abilities. It fives us a means for our own independence, enabling us to stand on our own two feet, to stand in our own ground. (p.64) And I will add to this...to walk our own path.
She goes on to reveal something so profound:
The first chakra is the most specific and limited level in the system. A limitation is a boundary, separating something from what is around it in order to define it. A boundary creates a necessary limitation that allows us to have smething whole, something specific. In order to manifest, we must be able to accept limitation...when we cooperate with first chakra limitations, our energy builds up and naturally expands to the other levels...The essential paradox here isthat we must accept limitation in order to transcend it. We must consolidate each level in order to move on. (p.65)
In other words, manifestation requires an acceptance of limitation. A boundary allows us to contain, and thus collect and build.
I have refused to accept limitation, choosing to live in the illusion of freedom. The irony of this is that I have lived enslaved in the first chakra level of consciousness. To move and walk forward, I must, and get to - consolidate, and complete this chakra.
So it's not like I just get to continue on, and arrive in England, walk and all will be contained in a neat little package of "been there, done that." No, no, no. I do leave my daily life and get to walk a sacred path to catalyze and initiate the healing, AND I return home to live into the lessons, challenges, and gifts of that chakra. They are not separate. They intertwine and weave together, cross over each other at sacred sites along the way. Oh my, it is the just like the map of the Mary Michael Line in England! There is the ley line, straight and clear. This is similar to the the intention and the map of the journey to the destination, intention, dream, goal. And then there is the journey itself - our lives here on Earth and in our physical bodies - that is the winding and spiraling serpent.
I have not been willing to accept limitation because I did not even know what that meant! Having been uprooted, and consequently, not having a relationship with my roots or my core, I have been like a "blue light hovering above the Earth", looking down and saying "it's awfully dense down there!" (said to me during a spiritual reading many years ago) I haven't known that I could could root. I have lived without my roots since I was two years old, so for me, it's just the way it is, and I have learned how to compensate, cope and just live with this as my reality. Now, I am aware of the imbalance in my root chakra. I am aware of my compensations. I am aware and acknowledge my deep desires and longings to return home and reconnect with my roots. I am aware of a whole new world being available to me, and that I can root into the warm belly of the Earth, and ask for - even demand - that I get to receive the Earth's sacred energies, and extract what I require for my personal, and my family's preservation, and physical, emotional and spiritual lives here on Earth.
To receive all of this and more, I both have to - and get to - reconnect with my taproot that reaches right down into the center of the Earth and her loving, creative and receptive belly. I must accept the "limitations" of my rootedness so that I can be free to contain, collect, and generate, build and create the life of my dreams, longings and soul's purpose. Such is the paradox of life!
"To move freely you must be deeply rooted."