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The Spiral Path

Reflections, explorations and musings on the spiral path - in our daily lives, on our daily walks, on sacred journeys on ancient pilgrimage paths.  

The Spiral Path calls and challenges us to walk deeply and to live rooted and aligned, awake and aware. It calls us to be willing to connect with our core selves and from the depths of our deepest desires and dreams, aligned with our soul gifts, authentic beauty and creative genius, to live an extraordinary and free life! 

​Join me as I share with you the gifts from the Spiral Path!

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How did I awaken to my Vagina, you may ask?!!

2/20/2015

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What if my strength and the core of my being ~
the tap root within my body is my vagina,
has been hidden in plain sight all along?


I was in Prague nearly 2 months ago, when I made a vow to cross the threshold.  I committed to taking a journey, a descent down to the Dark Goddess, to explore my shadow, my depths, my hidden and rich interior, to find the gold in the dark interior.

What would call me down...and in?  What could lure me across the threshold, and perhaps even show me the map of this journey?
  When and how am I going to go to the core and connect to my roots, cultivate my strength, and live my life, fully aligned with my soul and my soul's purpose? What will it take for me to go to the core?  It sounds like what will it take for me to "go to the mat?" 

What will give me the catalyst, and even more, give me the map with directions and a guide to take this seemingly perilous journey?  What, who will guide and provide for me every step of the way?

The Path.  The Path will guide and provide for me every step of the way.

My experience of walking a sacred pilgrimage is that there are places along the way that seem to have a pull on you and that you remember differently than other places.  They may just have a personal significance for you.  Something happened to you at that place.  Perhaps you had an insight, a breakdown, a breakthrough, an encounter that somehow changed you and in turn, this place becomes a personal sacred site for you.  Long after your actually being there, they continue to work on you, reverberating in you on a cellular level, opening minute spaces to light and awareness, and creating shifts and change on a molecular level. 

Also possible is that a site holds a more universal sacred energy.  Usually, energy ley lines converge here.  Something feels different. Special.  Heightened.  Resonating.  Often there is a well, a grove, a church, a Celtic cross, an ancient stone, or a stone circle at this very site as evidence that reflects and/or celebrates the converging energies, and that most likely, people have been gathering here for thousands of years to align with the energies, celebrate them, receive from them, use them.  There is so much that I could write about sacred sites - a whole book could be written.  Many books have been written.  I will create a Resource Page on my website so that you can easily access and find different books on sacred sites, pilgrimage, etc.

Boscowen'un

In all of my walking and pilgrimages, the site that continues to "work" on me the most deeply is Boscowen'un, the sacred stone circle that lies on the Mary Michael Line
in western Cornwall.

This sacred site has invited me, moved me, held me and challenged me both times that I have journeyed to it, first in June 2013 when I walked by myself for 15 days, and then again last summer in June 2014, when I was co-leading the Spiral Paths Pilgrimage
where we weave together the pilgrimage journey
with the sounding of the Earth
.  Here's what I wrote in June 2013:
The image of the sacred circle of stones with a vertical stone in the middle has been with me throughout this journey.  I experienced it at Boscawen-un just outside of St. Buryan in western Cornwall on the second day of my pilgrimage.  This circle is a very ancient, potent and powerful circle of stones that invited me in to lie down in the middle next to the vertical stone, with the intention to open and receive its energies. Since then, I have been mulling over the stone circles, and the image of the circle and the point in the middle.  I believe that it is an ancient symbol that speaks powerfully and directly to our heart, soul and psyche and does not even engage the mental mind.  
Picture
@Gifts from the Path. Boscowen'un Stone Circle, Penwith, Cornwall. June 2013
Over the past 20 months, Boscowen'un has worked and worked me, and has even become the core of the body of work that Wende and I are co-creating together.  As we work with the energies of our experiences together and develop our body of work together, we keep returning to Boscowen'un.  It was a central to our 2014 pilgrimage experience, and we continue to consciously use it as we co-create.  We both had very powerful experiences here this past summer, in profoundly different ways.  I will share mine in another blog post. 

To deepen our working with the energies of Boscowen'un, Wende and I decided to work more closely with the energies of Boscowen'un within the container of a coning in early January.
  Since this day, we both have had access to deeper wisdom and guidance, and have also experienced significant shifts in our lives, both independently and together, that is creating a flow of energy moving us forward.  Decisions have been undone and changed.  Directions have significantly shifted. Anything that was not fully aligned with the profound energies of Boscowen'un rapidly dropped by the wayside.  Choices and decisions that just a few months ago seem improbable are now in place.  Just to give you an idea:
  • Homeschooling my 13 year old daughter for the remainder of 8th grade.  She was hit by a cosmic 2x4 in early November.  Quite literally, she fell backwards and hit her head, ending up with a concussion and persistent, significant headache that made going to school impossible.  It became clear after the holidays (and the beginning of January) that going back to school was really not an option, thus homeschooling, a choice that has redirected and shifted both of our lives.
  • Waiting to offer the next Spiral Path Pilgrimage to Cornwall in 2016 instead of 2015.
  • Not leading a proposed hiking walk tour in Cornwall in June 2015 for a small group from Boulder.
  • Not offering a tour in July with my father for his historical saga, The Miner and the Viscount, choosing instead to focus on marketing the book to hundreds and thousands of people, expanding into the vision of the book becoming a TV or movie series, and creating a documentary.
  • Receiving invitations to walk in France, Scotland and even the Great Wall in China, yet it's not time to choose or do anything to define the future.
  • Enrolling in a crazily named class, Vagina Kung Fu, an 8-week class designed to strengthen the vagina.  More about this later!!
While each of these shifts and choices has been very unexpected, there has also been an inner experience that each has been divinely orchestrated.  I've just had to pay attention, accept what it, surrender, be willing, align myself with, and stay open to the flow.  Sure, I could fight and resist, but I can feel the rightness of all that is showing up and unfolding.  I am being asked to be present, responsive and open to receive the ancient wisdom and innate intelligence of this sacred site, and to trust this journey that it takes me on.

Only now am I now ready to fully receive the natural intelligence and innate wisdom held in the stones of Boscowen'un. 

A most powerful, personal sacred site, and an ancient sacred circle of stones that has been part of this wild landscape for thousands of years.  I experience this sacred site as a place of worship and celebration of the Goddess.  These sacred stones in a sacred configuration remind us of the dark feminine energies that pulsate in the Earth, and offers us a way to reconnect with Her and find our way home to ourselves through an intimate, loving, powerful, respectful, co-creative relationship with Her and all of her beauty and resources. 

This circle of stones is guiding and providing me with the map, the container, the calling and the pull into the core of my being, deep into my depths, my essence, my body and my Soul.
Picture@Wendalyn Bartley. The center stone at Boscowen'un, June 2014.
How can a circle of ancient stones have this kind of impact and influence on me and my life?

This stone circle is unlike most other sacred stone circles in that it has a center stone.  This powerful stone is angled and in many ways, appears to be very masculine and phallic, sticking out of the ground in the middle of the feminine circle of stones.  I would imagine that most assume that it is masculine.  At first, I too
made an assumption that it had to be masculine....until recently.  Aware of a deep unrest within me, I knew that this conclusion didn't feel right.

Picturefrom "The Sun and the Serpent" by Paul Broadhurst and Hamish Miller, Mythos, 2013.
As you can see from the picture, the center stone is in alignment with the energy line.  One question may be, does the stone align with the flow of the energy line, or is the direction of the energy line created by the stone?  Turns out that I am asking the same questions as Paul Broadhurst and Hamish Miller.  It was their seminal book, The Sun and the Serpent, that called me to England to walk the Mary Michael Pilgrims Path in the land of my ancestors, and as it turns out, the land of my family, and me.

In The Sun and the Serpent, Paul Broadhurst and Hamish Miller explored and questioned this specific alignment, wondering if it was a natural or intentional occurrence:
According to our observations this stone, erected in the Bronze Age or earlier, actually caused the energy flow to re-orientate or it marked the precise spot where this happened naturally.  Either way, this could throw light on the argument that has raged between antiquarians about whether the stone had originally been upright, and subsided, perhaps through excavation, or whether it had been meticulously set at this angle thousands of years ago.  It if was raised with this intention, then it must surely mean that there is a long shaft of stone buried beneath the ground in order to counteract natural subsidence. 
                                                                                                                p. 123
Given that everything about these ancient stone circles is about intention, precision, alignment, balance and sacred connection between the stars, Sun and Earth, I firmly believe that this center stone was intentionally and meticulously set to align with the feminine energy current.  This then begs the question about the energy of the stone itself?  Is it masculine aligning itself with the feminine as a way of bringing the masculine and feminine together in sacred relationship?  

Or, what if the stone actually feminine?  So deeply and sacredly, divinely feminine that its truth is hidden in plain sight?

What if it's actually not phallic at all?

What if it's actually vaginal?  As in the female genitalia of the Sacred Feminine herself - the clitoris and the vagina, the center and the core of the beautiful feminine, Goddess body, and I will add, the human woman's body too?  The clitoris being the exposed tip of the stone, and the vagina buried deep in the earth, synchronistically at a very similar angle to the vagina in a woman's body?

Even Broadhurst and Miller said,
"
It if was raised with this intention, then it must surely mean that there is a long shaft of stone buried beneath the ground in order to counteract natural subsidence."

Underground lies a massive stone that balances, roots and stabilizes the angled stone
in the center of the circle, and toward the center of the Earth?  What if the shaft is not phallic at all but a feminine vagina leading to the sacred womb of Mother Earth herself?

WHAT IF THE STONE AT THE CENTER OF BOSCOWEN'UN IS FEMININE?

How does this awareness shift MY - and our - experience of this sacred stone circle, and in turn, of ourselves and our relationship with the Earth, and the Goddess?

I have been distracted for many of these past 18 months in believing that my strength and power lay in my embracing more of my inner masculine energy, and this has only created more of the same. 

In waking up to the core as feminine, and even more explicitly, the core as our VAGINA, I find myself excited that the source of my power lies WITHIN me, and I want to surrender to this sacred feminine power that has been within me all along!  I want to fling the doors open and dive into Her, and go wherever she wants me to go!

It's just so obvious, and simple. 

OUR CORE FEMININE STRENGTH, POWER AND CONNECTION LIES IN OUR VAGINAS.
 

MY CORE STRENGTH, POWER AND CONNECTION LIES IN MY VAGINA.

The center stone of Boscowen'un demonstrates this to us this truth with its magnificent center stone intentionally set into the earth at a remarkable angle, aligned with the Mary Line.  Mistaken as a masculine phallus, this core stone actually mimics the feminine vagina, with the bulk of its shaft anchored deep in the earth.  Touching this stone, sitting at its base, leaning our bodies into it, communicating and listening to it, sounding with it - these visceral experiences invite us to breathe into our vaginas, connect with our feminine bodies, and in turn, to embrace the magnificent power of our vaginas - passion, desire, creativity, sexuality, conception, birthing, strength, and to to re-connect with the sacred Feminine and these lost aspects of ourselves. 


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A Windy Preparation for my Soul and Body

12/4/2014

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I went on a windy walk one day last week, so windy that as I turned down the gravel road to the trailhead, I could see the grasses blowing ferociously along the side of the road.  The wind created an unusual experience.  It wasn't my typical walk of just walking along a path that I have walked many times. It was an experience in and of itself that opened my soul, cleansed my body and prepared me in an elemental way for a deep and sacred journey. As I was on the last stretch, heading back to the car, I realized that my walk was not just a walk. I recognized that it had a special quality about it and that both the walk and I were being held in a sacred container.

The wind had transformed my walk into a journey on the Spiral Path. I was blown into a different dimension, out of the normal, everyday realm and transported into a sacred and mystical realm on the sacred Spiral Path.   In Jane Meredith's words from The Descent to the Dark Goddess:

..the mystical [realm is the] one...when you slip across from one realm into another, into the sacred; into the realm of the Dark Goddess herself. In this layer you will feel the divine all around you and within you, and you will sense yourself as being in an altered, perhaps luminous space.

As I walked, I reveled in the solitude, the protective intensity of the wind, the safety of being alone out in Nature with my dog as my companion. I laughed out loud, sang, sounded, and delighted in this totally unexpected pleasure of being on the Spiral Path.


Oh, how I've missed Her.

The Spiral Path is a delicious and alive place to walk. It is mystical, nourishing, and so real. Paradoxically, it can seem so unreal and otherworldly at the same time. Ah, the presence of paradox. In Carolyn Myss' words, paradox is the language of Spirit, so when paradox is present, so is Spirit!

As I completed my journey and was heading back to the car, I reflected on this amazing experience and realized that I had walked through five distinct stages of a sacred, spiral journey: Preparation, Descent, Being In, Ascent and Integration. All five aspects were totally present as I walked the circular path around Boulder Valley Ranch. 

Allow me to share:

PREPARATION

Rupert and I began our walk from the parking lot by circling around the north side of the ranch. Immediately greeted by the ferocious wind, we were pushed us along the path, sometimes very literally. Even my sticks were getting swept by the wind, and at times, I was walking, almost running with the wind.  It pushed me up the little hill out of the ranch and onto the mesa.  As I looked up and toward the east, I could see the rough, white waves on the water of the Boulder Reservoir, so big that I could see and feel them from where I was a couple of miles away. As I walked, I found myself thinking of the journey I have committed to meet the Dark Goddess, and I asked the wind to cleanse me of all resistance - a request I asked consciously; in hindsight, I was also asking unconsciously to be cleansed and cleared of any place that I am misaligned and attached with my ego.

As we headed toward the furthest distance from the car, Rupert looked back at me as if to say "really, we're really doing this?!".  Truthfully, I was asking myself the same thing, because as soon as I would turn the corner to head south down the hill, I knew that I would no longer have the wind at my back.

DESCENT

I turned down the hill, with the wind on my right side pushing me toward the east.  It was intense, cold and invigorating to say the least.  I was on the path all by myself, with my dog.  No one else was coming out in this wind!  As I started to walk on the east side of the pond that sits at the bottom of the valley, the coldness of the wind picked up as it gathered the icy air from the top of the frozen pond.  Plus, I was down in the bottom of the valley which created a funnel for the ferocious winds.  It was so loud, and I realized that I could make sounds to match the wind and that no one would hear me.  So I stood facing the wind, asking it to cleanse me in every cell of my being.

BEING IN

I turned so that my back was to the wind, and I yelled.  I sounded.  I connected to a deep rage and anger that was emerging from my the depths of my being. I sounded from my belly to release the anger, to cleanse it from my system. I found myself thinking of a former friend with whom I have felt angry at our last conversation and betrayed by my perception of her need to be right.  I yelled.  I sounded.  I screamed.  And the wind carried away my pain and my anger, the fear that was lying just below began to surface. I turned into the wind and faced the truth that I was afraid of this person, of standing up to, of speaking my truth. It is easier to feel anger than fear, and so I allowed her to dominate me, and leave me voiceless and apologetic.

I breathed deep into my belly and found a deeper voice, a voice below the fear and anger. I found my strength, my truth, my resolve and my core.

I howled and hollered into the wind with all of my being. I became lighter and lighter, stronger and stronger.

I rejoiced in the release. I bowed to the wind and honored Her presence and support. I knew that she had held a sacred and private space for me to sound into, and in turn, She received my anger and fear and used it to fuel her ferocity. Ah. Thanks be to the great Goddess.

ASCENT:

I began my walk up the hil. Rupert was delighted to be running again! As I walked, I had the conversation that I wished I had had with this person at the time. I spoke it outloud, from my body, in my strength and truth, with my heart open and my mind clear. I climbed out from the "hell" in the bottom of the valley, and with every step, I embodied the lightness that I had become aware of at the bottom. It infused every cell. My walk shifted to one of purpose, clarity and commitment. I completed the conversation, and at the same time, my relationship with this person.

In that moment, I opened up to know that the issues and challenges, as well as the direct barbs and criticisms that arose out of the original fateful conversation were not mine to take on. I asked, "Are these words and attacks mine, or someone else's?" With delight, I knew the answer and "returned to sender with love and compassion."   I took responsibility where responsibility was due, and returned the rest to where it belonged!

I was free.

INTEGRATION:

At this point, I had reached the top of the hill and only had to walk the remaining, relatively flat section of the path along the ditch and bare cottonwood trees.

I fell into deep, peaceful contemplation as I walked. I wondered about my choices and possibilities out of this new experience of freedom.

I found myself thinking of and longing for England. Oh, to go home and to live there.

But more, I found myself longing to go deep within myeslf, to meet my Soul, and to live with Her as my trusted ally and guide. Even more, I knew that I had been given the map for the descent to meet my Soul and to engage with Dark Goddess. I had been given the experience of going in and going down, and most especially of coming back up, whole and complete within myself.

My greatest fear of not returning and of being eaten alive and spit out by the Dark Goddess had been resolved in the healing, love and compassion of my experience.

This journey and descent has to be my commitment, my quest, my journey. To experience my wholeness, living from the depth and truth of my being

No matter what.

To risk who I've been to become who I may be. To meet my Self, my darkness, my shadow, the Dark Goddess. To love, embody and accept all of my Self, my Soul, my purpose and mission, and to be Home wherever I am, with all of who I am.

WIth each step closer to the car, I opened up to an acceptance of myself, my journey and my purpose.

WIth a map and an experience of the sacred, spiral journey to meet the Dark Goddess, I am preparing and being prepared for this sacred journey. The next step beckons...

This is the gift of the spiral path. You do not return to the same place you started, as in a circle. You come back a different person, an expanded and deeper expression of who you were, and so the threshold from which you reenter the world must be different to accommodate this transformation. And so it is, close to and resembling the entrance into the mystical path, but on a different turn of the spiral that you return and reenter your life.

Such is the gift and the magic of the spiral path. For truly, when the spiral path ends, the journey truly begins.

Ahhh. The winds of change, and magic. I offer my gratitude for transporting me into the mystical realm, for giving me the map of my soul's journey, and for preparing me for this most sacred of journeys.

Solvitur Ambulando!

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Preparations for the Descent

12/2/2014

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I am challenged to write this blog.  I know how I write best, which is immediate, personal and intimate.  When I write any other way, I become twisted up into knots and end up not writing.

And if I do keep writing, it become a labor, rather than an authentic expression.  I try to be more factual, informational, and erudite.  I feel as though I have to bring in sources, examples, and explanations.  I then get lost in my own words, and lose the thread of what I am writing about.

Some people in my life have expressed their concern that my writing is too personal, too revealing, too close to home.  And so I have removed those pages that have threatened people close to me.  I meant no harm in what I wrote, yet it was taken as criticism and blame.  I felt so bad that I had written anything that could be construed in such a way to hurt someone that I immediately deleted those posts to "protect" those people who had criticized my writing.

Yet, in the process of protecting and honoring them, I inadvertently shut the door on myself and my sharing  through my writing of my journeys - both inner and outer.  I can feel the threat of being too personal, too intimate, too immediate, and mostly, too revealing. 

So I don't write.  Or if I do, I keep it to myself, and put it into files, or the Cloud, so that some day, one day I may use what I have written.

But this is not how I write best.  I love to write in blog form.  It works for me to feel as though I am writing to someone who may read what I have written.  Even as I write this, I realize no one may even read what I have written, and that's okay!  This is how I need and want to write, as though someone may read what I write, and hopefully, that they receive a gift of insight, support, example, being able to relate, or a nudge to take the next step on their journey.  

So it's time for me to cross the threshold and write.  Write, and write some more.  To share with you my journey.  I can tell you, it's not always smooth and pretty, easy and joyful.  The outer pilgrimages I am called to take catalyze a deep inner journey that is, quite honestly, much more difficult and challenging than the outer journey.  These inner journeys - the true spiral path - makes the physical pilgrimages look easy in comparison.

I have been home now from my pilgrimage to and around Glastonbury for over two months, and I have never felt so unsettled, challenged, stuck and ill-at-ease within myself.  It is very challenging to know how to move forward, to root myself back home with my family when a part of me wants to root over in England, especially in Cornwall and Glastonbury. One foot in each of these sacred places - one foot in Cornwall, the land of my father and his Celtic ancestors; the other foot in Glastonbury and the land of my mother and her ancestors.  

Instead of moving forward, I am actually being called down and in.  Believe me, I have tried to move forward.  On to the next thing.  The next pilgrimage.  The next class.  The next offering.  And the only place I feel any resonance with is down and in.  So I am going on an inner journey to meet my Self.  Down on a journey of descent to meet and connect with my soul.

Nothing has worked to go forward.  The only direction that has any pull for me is down.  So when a Facebook friend invited her friend to join her on a 21 Day Sadhana journey to meet the Dark Goddess, I knew my answer was yes.  Filled with trepidation and wondering if my naiveté was getting the better of me, I still knew that my answer was a wholehearted, full-bodied yes.  And as I began my journey with her and her small group, I came across an amazing book called Journey to the Dark Goddess - How to Return to Your Soul by Jane Meredith.   
www.janemeredith.com

In this rich book, Meredith outlines the map of the journey to the Dark Goddess, with its Preparation, Descent, Being In, Ascent and Integration.  I knew that this book and even the 21 day sadhana were providing me with the container, directions and map for a journey that I have resisted my whole life.  It is as though I have been stuck at the threshold for as long as I can remember, terrified to take the step in and down into the darkness of my own being.

Before I left for England in June, I had a Soul Fire Session with Sera Beak www.serabeak.com.  The essence of the gift I received from this session was that I had to put as much time into planning and mapping my inner journey as I do my outer pilgrimages, and journey to my inner sacred sites.  

And so here I am, nearly six months later, being presented and invited into a descent that I had no idea at the time I would take.  Even now, as I begin my preparations for this inner journey, I feel a lightness and a rightness to go down and meet the Dark Goddess.  A lightness that supports and holds me as I prepare to descend into the darkness.  The paradox - the gift from Spirit that confirms the next step in front of me to take.

This is what I have to write about…this journey into the unknown, the unknowable.  And to write authentically, personally, and intimately, I have to risk being too personal, too intimate, too immediate.  Please bear with me as I risk this, for in this journey, I will find my voice.  Wow. Divine typo just happened.  As I typed "voice", the word "void" appeared.  As I write, I will find my void and emerge through it with my wholeness.

Thank you for reading this and thank you for allowing me this space to share my journey with you. 

Solvitur Ambulando.

With love In love As Love For Love.

Ultreya.


1 Comment

    Sarah

    I love to walk.  I love to write.
     

    I am a pilgrim. 
    I am a Womb Shaman.
    I am the Feminine Christ Awakened.  
    ​I am becoming the Feminine Christ Embodied. 


    I walk the sacred spirals of the ancient pilgrimage paths and sacred sites along the "dragon" ley lines of the Earth.  I walk local paths. I walk to be in Nature.  I walk labyrinths and spirals. I walk to move and celebrate my body. I walk to come home to the truth of who I truly am, to connect with the Earth and Spirit, and to live my life aligned with my soul's path. My intention is to walk In Love, As Love, For Love.

    I have led Spiral Path Pilgrimage Walks & Retreats in Cornwall in the very southwest of England.

    Mostly, I have been walking the sacred paths of the Womb Spiral - internally and in Penwith, Cornwall.  These sacred journeys continue to take me more and more deeply in to the core essence of who I am - as a women and as the embodiment of the Divine Feminine.  As I root more deeply into my essence, I have experienced a strength and presence within myself that cultivates a clarity and ferocity that demands a willingness to stand in truth and love.  This in and of itself has created a tsunami of change in my life that 

    Picture
    Sarah at Chalice Well, Glastonbury, England, September 2014.

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